the alley cat

seriously though. i thought i was gonna poop my pants the entire time LOL　

…bad. 

And when I say bad, I’m not talking about any of that “omg i calculated it myself and judging from the amount i got wrong, the highest i can get is a 780 OMG FAILUREEE”

um. NO. SHUT YOUR MOUTH. Although this is definitely not an ideal score for many people, judging from the scores I was getting on my practice tests, 760 was like a far-away dream goal for myself. But realistically, my goal was to get above at least a 720 since I’d been skirting around the low 700’s and my brother got a 720 by self-study. So, you know. If I didn’t get what he got at least, it’s really a letdown to my parents since they spent all this money to put me in classes that were supposed to get me 800’s and stuff and then not get as good as him.

I’ve never felt so unconfident about a test though. Well the first time I took a practice test, I got 570/590 LOL but that was before I started studying at all so I wasn’t expecting much. And apparently it was above average for taking the test the first time HAHA.

But yeah. Everyone’s all talking about test scores, and like, 760 is like terrible for them. When I feel like I got in the 600’s. Maybe around 640~680. Like I’m not exaggerating or anything. Based on my previous scores from practice, I really do feel like that’s about what I got.

When I first got the test, I read the first question, and was like, “Hm. I’ll come back to this later.” And I ended up skipping like the first few pages LOL. Because they were all questions that referred to a picture, and I’m just super bad at anything with a diagram. Like, I know the “answer” to the question, but when I look at the diagram, I just blank out and I don’t know what’s what. Because, of course, the picture’s not gonna be exactly the same as the picture I studied from. And so I just can’t adapt to the slight differences. Big big weakness of mine I should really focus on fixing this next time.

Oh yeah. I’m probably definitely 100% sure I’m going to retake it again. My parents are actually okay with it. 

um okay super embarrassing, but. In the morning, I was eating breakfast. I was really tired though, since I got like 4-5 hours of sleep. (I went to bed early, I just couldn’t fall asleep and was like, wide awake at 1:45 and then I just hid my alarm clock since the numbers were too bright.) And I was eating, and my parents asked me something, and I was answering. Then suddenly I just got really scared and starting crying. Like, I haven’t been seriously worried about the SAT, but everything just hit me at that moment. smh rebecca

But I guess my parents felt bad for me so they were all supportive and were like you can always retake it and then they talked about Megan, who got a bad score her first time and retook it and did the other test and got an 800 and is majoring in Biology now and going to medical school blah blah

I guess I’m glad it’s over though. It’ll just be kind of embarrassing when scores come out in a few months, and I might have this really bad score compared to everyone else. And it’ll be embarrassing to e-mail the MIT teacher my score, since it’s a letdown for her, too.

A lot of people mentioned cancelling the scores, though. I mean, they’re probably joking, I know that. But it made me think about it. And…I don’t have any sort of inclination to cancel my score. At all. Like, I’m more confident that I got an unsatisfactory score than I was in majority of my answers, but I’m still curious to see what I got. My curiosity is bigger than anything else. 

i don’t know. Is that bad? maybe it’d be better for me to cancel, but whatever.

Also, to the people on Facebook who are saying things like, “omg my chances of 800 are very, very low.” (oh yeah if anyone knows who i copy and pasted this from, i don’t have anything against the person themself.) Yeah I know that I said I don’t like it when people do that. But at the same time, I’m still really happy for you guys! Because when you do get that 800 or high 700 (which is still really, really good), I mean. You can’t help but feel kind of happy for them, right? It’s like, good for you. Good for you for spending all that time studying so you could get a good score. Because in the end, it all paid off. and they deserve it